Blakey, real name Muttonhead, has lifted the lid on a can of delicious shame that stretches back almost 50 years.

'I had been working on the buses and it was starting to get on top of me. I turned to a glass of weak orange squash at a BN Crew party in 1964 and within five minutes I was chasing the dragon all around the schoolyard. It was powerful weak.'

His book, 'Ron the buses', is expected to name several high ranking BN members as regular drug users, a claim that is very poorly defended by BN manufacturing manager Beardo. 'Yeah, that all seems pretty accurate' he told sources.

Blakey himself has received some criticism for 'exaggerated stories' and 'bizarre impossibilities' in the book, not least the fact that he has been dead for several
years and that the BN Crew was only formed in 1997 and his book ends in 1988. 'You'll always get the revisionists' he explained 'It is how I say it is. Dig?'

It is not certain whether or not Blakey is even in the BN Crew as we had a brief obsession with him for a week or so but it seems fairly definite now that a dead fictional TV character is now Murphy somehow.