*Hamhead Dead, Kids Rejoice*
Children worldwide last night rejoiced as news came through of the sudden death of BN member Hamhead.

His untimely death came as a result of months of fighting in the BN camp. Tension had been mounting between the Hambone and fellow band member Gumpner after Gumpner
attempted to murder Hamface who returned the favour just weeks later.

Mediators between the pair had warned of this but still egged them both on. Hamhead who had suffered from; aids, hepatitis, elephantitis, jebaditis and the clap had been trying to sleep off a nasty case of siflis when Gumpner smothered him. No charges will be brought against Gumpner who it is said will be disciplined by an internal BN discipline committee and then rewarded by the same committee.