*Litvinienko Earns Posthumous BN Crew Membership*
The widow of poisoned Russian spy Alexander Litvinienko today spoke of her confusion at the posthumous induction of her former husband into the BN Crew.

Ms Litvinienko spoke of how she heard of this honour being bestowed upon her husband at his funeral as several BN members shook his coffin and made jubilant noises in accordance with BN tradition.

The Russian born woman, who had been married to Mr. Litvinienko for a while I'd say, told how she has never heard of the BN crew and could not understand their interest in her husband.

In her first interview since yesterday, Ms Litvinienko described how a number of BN members lead by mincer caused confusion and possible salmonella at the funeral claiming that 'its what Alexander would have wanted'.

BN spokesperson Gapfret commented that everything is great.