*Lofty Throws Hat Into Race*
The last few weeks had seen an interesting campaign develop, with some candidates dropping out due to scandals while others less favoured rocketed to the tops of the polls.

A televised debate had been scheduled earlier tonight for RubbishThroughouttheEvening 1 but a BN posse took control of the studio and proceeded to broadcast their own seemingly pre planned programming.

The posse, lead by shamed leader Ceb, forced the presidential candidates to run around the studio in a race while Lofty threw his vast collection of hats at them.

The bizarre scenes continued for close to 11 hours before Lofty ran out of hats and headed off somewhere. All candidates have now declared themselves out of the running and instead threw their support behind Lofty.